Do You Fear Death?

I am afraid of dying. When I was 17 or so, this thought kept coming back to me that I am going to die before I am 23. Now I am 32 and still alive, but I can’t stop thinking about death and dying. I can not fathom why I have to die. I don’t want to.

The second biggest fear in my life beside dying is the fear of loosing my dear ones. I can’t even think about it, let alone discuss it.

I believe that when (if) I grow old, I would still be clinging to my life as dearly as I do now. There was a time, when my daughter was born, I used to think about death every waking hour.

Fear of death hasn’t made me a better person or do things differently. I still fight with my husband( though I regret it later), I still don’t like to mingle with people( though I envy those who do), I still think that the whole world is against me ( though I have been blessed with many beautiful things in my life).

Sometimes I think that I should change the way I live, because someday I am going to die and then I won’t be able to rectify my mistakes or whatever wrong I am doing. I start with enthusiasm, will be happy for an hour and then again turn into the same old sluggish me.

Tags: death, fear of death